Tuesday, October 9, 2012

beer tent diva

Bonjours, mon amis!

Isn't life just grand? The sun is shining and I'm full of coffee and soup. An exquisite Tuesday already.

Yesterday was rough. Look, I enjoy being a positive, happy, always-look-on-the-bright-side-of-life-(with-accompanying-whistles)-kind-of-person. I really try to like Mondays. I remind myself constantly that Mon in French means "my" so Mondays are really "my day". But then I have a day like yesterday and realize that that's just rubbish.

Time for dramatic bullets. 
  • I made myself get out of bed yesterday and go to the gym at 6 am. The things I do for popcorn. 
  • I spilled my one saving grace-- coffee-- all over my car on the way to work. Pros: my car smelled like pumpkins and coffee for the drive. Cons: Today my car smells like milk. 
  • Directly after spilling my coffee Duran Duran's Come Undone came on to mock my sanity.
  • I stopped to put gas in my car, only to find the price had gone up 12 cents per gallon over night. You want to know how much I paid? $4.78/gallon. I only filled up a half tank in protest. 
  • My lack of gym-ing/having a fun roommate who wants to eat everything with me has finally caught up. Cons: The pantaloons are way too tight. Pros: My butt looks great. See: going to the gym and eating soup.
  • My mom's refrigerator door fell completely off yesterday. I find this hilarious. Only because it was fixed. ...This probably doesn't belong on this list.

There, I feel better now. Bullets aren't always the answer though. Remember that.

Sunday on the other hand was a wonderful day full of odd adventures. I went to the Oktoberfest in Torrance with my family!

This was my first American Oktoberfest as an adult. It's been a while since I went to my last Oktoberfest in Tucson. We would go every year in the hot dusty desert surrounded by our closest family friends. I have a lot of fond memories there. My family is fairly American but when it comes to the chicken dance, bratwurst, and beer we're as German as it gets.

I was overly excited about going. For one, I have my Bavarian dirndl I bought in Munich that I was just itching to wear. It only comes out of my costume box for parties or as a last-minute Halloween costume so I jump at any occasion to wear it. That and the website said if I wore it, admission was free. Done and done!

Heck yeah picture of myself in the mirror.
Now the last time I was in a beer tent, I was in Bavaria, the home of Oktoberfest and all things Dult. I was shocked to find that this experience was very... different.

I... I'm a beer tent diva. 

When I arrived in my dirndl, I bopped over to the admission window, said my perkiest Heidi Klum Hallo! and curtsied with my apron. She was unamused. She then informed me that her supervisor just changed the rules and that dressed-up patrons had to pay. Starting now. 


I got over it.

Then we went inside and I realized I was the only person dressed up. Besides babies in lederhosen and the occasional woman dressed up in a barely there polyester St. Pauli Girl dress/buttflap.

They served beer in plastic cups instead of huge beer steins that give your hand a bruise from holding them. There were no mystical clouds hanging from the ceiling... just the occasional cobweb and a tiny German flag or two.

Everyone was sitting down. No one was standing up on the benches and sloshing beer around and getting in fights. There were no fights at all. No one trying to kiss me. Just people, sitting quietly, sipping from their 16 oz biodegradable cups and eating their cold bratwurst with no mustard in sight, just ketchup.

Let me try to explain. You've been to the moon. Then you come back to earth, visit a dark office space in Idaho with a rented disco ball, flashing lights, and laser sounds. There's a sign on the wall that reads, "Welcome to the Moon". 

...I'm a beer tent diva.

There are worse things to be in the world. And you know what? I did have a fantastic time. I was really there to spend time with my family and drink beer and I accomplished both of those things. Yeah yeah yeah positive thinking.

My "aunt" Susie tucking dollar bills into the trumpeter's pants, despite being instructed to place them in his sock.

My sister-in-law Emma and Mason eating a massive German(?!) cookie.
Roomie Ashley, me, & Mums.

My dear brother Jason clapping along to some weird rendition of Hände zum Himmel
Oktoberfest. I highly recommend it.

[In other news, I'm thinking about getting a nice camera in the near future. Does anyone have any recommendations/advice/free nice cameras?]

I hope you have a great day. Don't have a rude Monday-kind-of-day. And if you are, here's a video of ducks who have never been in water before. That should help.



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